Thread: If you are an animal...

...you wanna have a beaver as a friend, because they have some kickass houses.

I love Mitch and his type of humor. You should check out Steven wright as well. Mitch got a lot of inspiration from him.

I went to buy a house, and the agent said it had 2 bedrooms. But isn't it up to me how many bedrooms there are?

R.I.P. Mitch

He passed?

Yeah.

He used to do drugs. I mean, he still did, but he used to, too.

Well I knew that. With the slurred speech and all that. He was funny though.

Originally Posted by Shock Tsunami

He used to do drugs.

One of the local radio stations runs these call in contests where they ask 4-5 questions on various topics. One of the favorites used to be "How did they die" and they would ask how various celebrities died. For a couple of categories like comedians and rock stars, the keyword emphasized was "comic" or "rock star" and that was the clue that the answer was "overdose."

I hope the next time I move I get a real easy phone number, something that's real easy to remember. Something like two two two two two two two two. I would say "Sweet." And then people would say, "Mitch, how do I get a hold of you?" I'd say, "Just press two for a while. And when I answer, you will know you have pressed two enough."

Damn he was funny.

My favorite:

Wearing a turtleneck is like being strangled by a really weak guy, all day. Wearing a backpack and a turtleneck is like a weak midget trying to bring you down.

Originally Posted by aperson

Wearing a turtleneck is like being strangled by a really weak guy, all day.

In addition to being hilarious, this is so true.

"About once every three years I think about buying a yo-yo... I'll be a the store and I'll come up on the yo-yo section... And I'll fantasize about mastering it... To the point that it becomes a reference as to who I am... Do you know Mitch Hedberg? Is he the guy that kicks ass on the yo-yo? Yes I do. He is cool."

Mitch